This picture was taken by a fantastic photographer Andrew Van Gundy and you can see more of his work on his website or on his blog.
In This Picture:
The Bride and Groom are standing at the alter in a beautiful Greek Orthodox Church. Next to them stands the wedding party along with the Koumbara and Koumbaro.
The Koumbara is the name given to the couples sponsor if she is female, sort of like a ‘maid of honour’.
The Koumbaro is the name given to the couples sponsor if he is male, sort of like a ‘best man’.
The Koumbara and Koumbaro have a very important role in a Greek wedding ceramony and they do a lot more than just plan the hen’s night/buck’s night (I plan to write more about this in an upcoming blog).
At some of the Greek weddings i have been to, the Koumaro is the best man. At other weddings the bride and groom separated the roles and had both a Koumbaro and a maid of honour. Sometimes there are two Koumbari and sometimes there is a Koumbara, a Koumaro, a best man and a maid of honour.
In fact i have seen so many different combinations at weddings these days, because the Greek couple try to keep the Orthodox custom of having Koumbare but still wanting to be ‘Australian’ and call someone their best man.
So what do you think? Is the role of a Koumbara the same as the maid of honour?
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17 comments
Comments feed for this article
February 1, 2008 at 1:29 pm
Reverend Thomas
Bridal couples love to receive Gods blessing.
You are now be able to send or receive a lovely Wedding Blessing from God certificate from the website http://www.godsblessingsforyou.com
These blessings from God will become a precious record of your affection in the years to come.
Reverend Thomas
February 1, 2008 at 10:40 pm
Stratos
koumpara is amlost the same thing with the maid of honor. The principal difference is that is not needed a koumpara to be unmarried. She could be married too.Furtheromore, koumparos (the male equivalent of koumpara) is what is used to be called in the States “Best Man”.
February 1, 2008 at 10:43 pm
siamavris
Stratos: Are you suggesting that a maid of honour should be unmarried?
This leads me to another question: Are bridesmaides supposed to be single or can they also be married?
March 4, 2008 at 10:38 am
clowd
siamavris – my understanding of the term ‘maid’ and ‘matron’ of honour, is that a maid of honour is single and a matron is married. so depending on who the bride choosing, determines the title they receive.
March 28, 2008 at 1:00 pm
Michelle
In a purely traditional Orthodox wedding, I see the koumbara or koumbaro as almost a godmother or godfather of the marriage. So, as you say, the role goes far beyond helping everyone get dressed, holding flowers, and passing the rings, but also includings providing spiritual support throughout the life of the marriage.
In modernized Orthodox weddings, with fuller wedding parties, I’ve seen a koumbara or koumbara playing the dual role of maid/matron of honor or best man. It really depends on how the couple structures their wedding party. When my best friend married, she had a traditional wedding; when my mother remarried, she and my stepdad had a contemporary, larger wedding party.
July 23, 2011 at 7:29 am
Anonymous
Michelle/Monica, my husband has been asked by a young man at church to be his sponsor at his wedding. He has said yes, but has no idea what this entails. I am not sure if even the young man knows either, as he is a convert also. We are an OCA church with Greeks, Russians, Bulgarians and more. Can you give me an idea of my husband’s responsibilities…what he should do(as we know, most fall to the woman to do and set up and get ready for…while the man may actually be the one identified) and the time lines in which he should do them? We have know the young man only by speaking with him at church for about a year, and have only seen his intended once. They live out of town and travel a long ways to come to our church. Am I supposed to be doing anything separate from my husband? I hate not to be ready or have us not do the right thing, when it is someone’s wedding memories involved. I am a little overwhelmed reading this blog. I think my husband thought he just had to stand up with the young man. Thanks
September 9, 2008 at 4:56 am
Monica
Does the Koumbaro has to have a wife or girlfriend 9 partner ) in the ceremony, or can it attend by himself?
June 27, 2009 at 10:41 am
siamavris
Hi Monica,
I think that this is a decision for the bride and the groom.
I am the Koumbara for my sister’s wedding and my partner will not have a role in the bridal party on the wedding day. He will not stand up at the alter with us and he will not ride in the limo, sit at the main table or be in the professional photos.
However, my partner will still have a very important role in the couples future life. As Koumbara, i will go on to become the Godmother of my sister’s child. When my partner and i get married, my sister’s child will also become his Godchild.
The Koumaro does not have to have his wife or girlfriend in the ceremony but it is common to include them.
September 10, 2008 at 12:26 pm
Brittany
Does the Koumbara have to be Greek Orthodox, or is any Orthodox Christian okay to have as koumbara?
June 13, 2009 at 3:48 pm
Angela
Hi Brittany, yes the Koumbara has to be following the Orthodox relgion. Although, check with the priest who may (and this isn’t common) use his discretion and allow another relgion.
June 19, 2009 at 2:07 pm
Jelena
I’m a little bit confussed, I’ve been asked to be Maid of Honour, for my friend who is Australian marrying a Greek Orthodox Man and I’ve been told, that my role is not important in the Greek Church. So what is my role? And am I important, on the day?
June 27, 2009 at 10:26 am
siamavris
My sister has recently asked me to be the Koumbara for her wedding. I am so excited but at the same time, i am not exactly sure what my role entails. So i am doing some research on the topic to help me answer your questions… and my own:
Jelena – Yes! You are very important on the day! You are the Maid of Honour… and you are a friend of the Bride! In the Greek Orthodox Church the Koumbara must also be Orthodox – Greek, Russian, Serbian… it doesn’t matter as long as they are Orthodox.
Are you Orthodox?
If you are Orthodox, then you are able to participate in the blessings of the rings and the stefana. You will have an important religious role in the couples marriage.
If you are not Orthodox, then you will not be able to participate in the religious blessings of the rings and stefana. Only an Orthodox person can do this.
There are many roles that are important in a wedding. Ask your friend, the Bride, if you can help to plan the hens night or give a speech. She asked you to be a part of her wedding so this automatically makes you an important friend.
Whoever told you that ‘you are not important in the Greek Church’ was probably just referring to your religious responsibilities.
November 7, 2009 at 7:31 pm
Jelena-ath
In old times,the couple was in need of one witness-koumparos at the wedding.
After Second World war, couple could choose between civil and religion wedding or do both.
In the civil wedding,by the law,the couple would need 2 witnesses so the groom would choose his best friend and the bride would choose hers best friend.
These days, couples can mix and match what ever it suits them.
January 27, 2010 at 12:57 am
Anonymous
I am trying to understand the religious sponser …
The koumbaro/Koumara should be the Godparent of the couple getting married …
If the couple are both greek orthodox is it the bride or grooms decision
on who exchanges the crowns and rings …what is the orthodox tradtional
custome??
January 4, 2010 at 11:52 pm
Karen
Do both witnesses have to be Orthodox?
September 25, 2010 at 9:22 pm
Olga
Hi).
First, Koubara or Koubaros are spelling without “M” – greeks are spelling them with “M” cause they dont have letter “B” [koumpara-koumparos] – when you pronouns [mp] fast you get sound [b].
About Koubara and Kouparos – they can be merried or not – it’s not important.
The number of Koubara or Koubaros or both of each – is the choice of couple. I had two Koubaros on my wedding. There is also tradition – Koubaros or Koubara from the couple’s wedding also baptise couple’s children – Koubara and Koubaros also mean “Godmother” and “Godfather” on Greek. There is some wedding expenses which Koubaros and Koubara are obliged to pay for – like Stefana, Candles, Wedding rings (and then all clothes for baby for Baptism, Candle and the cross)))) – so it’s an expensive duty)))).
About Orthodox – have seen couples with bride or Koubara Catholic, but it’s here in Greece the Church have make some discount on this metter. It’s enough if Koubara or Koubaros is Christian and had being baptised.
And last, who exchanges the crowns and rings is decision of couple together with Koubaros or Koubara – there is no rule for it.
November 22, 2011 at 7:05 am
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